Wonderwall
by Vittrande
Summary: She breathed heavily, closing her eyes just to open them again. Wasn't it enough that her parents were lost, that the love of her life was dead, that her friends couldn't see past a façade? Now she had to deal with the fact that she was slowly falling in love with Draco Malfoy.
1. Yellow roses

**A/N: **Hello darlings. I'm writing this for my friend, Maria and I think that it will be quite updated, because of course, she is a pain in my ass. But a lovely pain.

Anyway. This is played after the war, with every dead person being dead and everything has happened like the books (well not quite the end, but that's another story). Let's get started, shall we?

**Chapter 1- **Yellow roses.

Hermione Granger hadn't moved all day. She had stayed in her bed (that was currently in the kitchen) eaten a few Kit Kats and read, a lot. A few tears had prickled her eyes, but no other sign of emotion had been shown to the emptiness of the house.  
The only room with things in were the kitchen, Hermione didn't have heart to do the rest. Her parents were lost in Australia and after months of trying to find them, she had finally given up and gone back home in defeat with a horrible tan.  
This was the house that she'd grew up in, but it was empty so near on her and the matrass she had laying on the kitchen floor.

Harry and Ron had tried to send her letters the first few months but given up after a while. Ginny, however, had not. Even though Hermione never answered them, she read them and got an update on what had happened in the wizard world.  
Harry was still not in his best state of mind, but Ron was showering in the glory of being a war hero. In Ginny's last letter, Hermione had found out that he was dating another girl (Stefanie or something) but that he truly loved Hermione and that everything would be alright if she came back.

Hermione had burnt the letter.

After their kiss, Hermione had went off searching for her parents. Ron, on the other hand couldn't seem to stay away from other women and after a while Hermione gave up on her last hope that they would end up together.  
She had been in love with him, yes and she had been a bit in love with Victor, yes but she had only had one person she truly loved.  
Thinking of him hurt her more than she could tell anyone, or write down. Her heart ached and her arms shivered. He had been her first kiss, her first lover and an amazing writer. Hermione hadn't exactly thought that he would notice her, no one ever noticed her looking at him. But he had, and that year was the best in her life.  
The days in his bedroom, sneaking in when his friends were gone, the nights in the prefect's bathroom and their walks around the lake, talking about stories and forests and everything that could fly.

Hermione muffled a sob in her pillow and breathed into it. Cedric Diggory had been the love of her life so far. But then he died, and then other people died, and she herself died. Her soul rot away in the Malfoy Manor with Bellatrix Lestrange knife, carving through her flesh.

The scar was still there, staring at her and Hermione turned on her side again, reaching for a Kit Kat and turning on the television.

* * *

The girl had just found out that her twin sister was alive and after someone made a joke and everyone started laughing -except the girl staring at the TV-screen with big hazel eyes-, a huge owl soared through the window.

Hermione eyed it carefully. It wasn't Ginny's nor the rest of her friends. She dragged herself up, standing unsurely on her legs before grabbing a snack and moving towards the owl.

After getting its treat, it gave Hermione the letter and flew of. She noticed that the sky was blue for once.

A short moment after that, before she had read the letter, another owl came soaring through the air. This one however flew into the glass and Hermione immediately knew who this was. It pecked her finger and she untied the letter.

First, she read the one from the big owl. It was long, at least three pages, but the information that it gave was quite clear on the first page. She was going back to Hogwarts for her last year. McGonagall and volunteers had rebuilt the destroyed parts of the school and the people that had been in the seventh year or not attended at all, had the opportunity of retaking the classes.

For Hermione, there wasn't a choice. She read the rest of the letter fast but stopped at the end of it. Her former teacher had written her a special note, asking for her to come a day earlier for the preparations of a separate room. She seemed well aware that Hermione still couldn't sleep near people after the war.

Then the girl read Ginny's letter. It was so happy and excited that Hermione didn't have the heart of burning it. Instead she stuffed it in her backpack and lay back down on the matrass, reaching for another Kit Kat.

* * *

Clothes, wand, medications, health stuff, books. She was ready. Hermione breathed heavily before stepping out into the sun. The tan from Australia still hanged onto her, but she hadn't been outside for a long time and hadn't seen sun for that time.

She preferred going by muggle train to the King's Cross station. It was quite crowded, and for once, she enjoyed it.  
The station looked familiar and when she saw the empty train, her heart skipped a beat. It was like she was eleven all over again. The train was only containing her so the silence was unbearable.

She sat down beside the window and picked out her mp3 before falling into slow slumber with The Smiths singing in her ears.

She reached Hogsmeade station at seven thirty pm and was met by an anxious looking Professor Slughorn. He was dressed in emeraldrobes and his hair (or what was left of it) had curled up in the cold autumn chill.

Hermione pressed her bags against her and forced a smile.

"Professor Slughorn", she greeted and he smiled widely.

"Miss Granger!" he mused when he saw her "It is a pleasure to meet the brightest witch of her age once more. But the cold is getting on my nerves, so we better hurry up. McGonagall is waiting in her office."

They walked, mostly in silence but with some polite chattering about the weather. Hermione felt even worse than before. Her heart dropped at the sight of the castle. It was as like the war had never been fought. She swallowed and it felt like the scar on her arm was burning a hole through the flesh.

The castle itself was empty, only containing the teachers which were nowhere to be seen. They continued to the headmistress's office. The statue that had been guarding it before was gone and replaced with a wizard carved in stone, holding a book.

"Well then Miss Granger. I hope that I shall see you in my NEWTS class?" Slughorn chattered on and Hermione only nodded, feeling faint. The professor left and she walked up the stairs to the office.

Minerva McGonagall looked a bit worn out but still the same. She smiled politely to the student and offered her a seat.

"Miss Granger, I expect that you know why we have summoned you a day early?" she asked and Hermione bent her head.

"Yes professor," she answered.

"Mr Potter told me about your sleeping problem but that will be no problem. We have a lot of rooms for people who necessarily need to be alone. If you follow me."

The headmistress swept out of the room, dressed in purple satin robes. Hermione followed, the bags still clutched tightly in her fists.  
They walked in silence again and Hermione found herself wishing for her friends to be there. The absence of them hadn't been so strong in her own house, but being out in world again, she felt vulnerable without them.

The passed the dungeons which Hermione thought odd and came to a portrait of a young lady. She wasn't fair but her face was pleasant to look at. Black hair was popping from behind her and her skin was dark with blue eyes shining through.

"This is Evangeline and this is your entrance," McGonagall said, smiling a bit. "_Electricity_," she said and Evangeline disappeared just to reveal a staircase.

"This leads up to a small tower. It's a long stair, but it is a beautiful room."

"I believe you", Hermione breathed and the headmistress nodded.

"Then I'll leave you here. The students will be arriving next evening, so be prepared to be located in the Great Hall then. Otherwise, you can do as you please."

She swept away and Hermione started walking. The staircase went round and round and on her left side, windows were showing her the lake. She hadn't realised how much she had missed the Hogwarts grounds.

It was a long walk, extremely long and Hermione was exhausted when she finally reached the room. It was round and had four big windows. A four-poster bed was pushed against the wall with the warm Gryffindor colours and to armchairs were resting in front of a fireplace. It was comfy and Hermione breathed out, letting her body fall onto the bead.

Alone, again. She pressed the earplugs into her ears and fell asleep.

* * *

When she woke up, it was almost midday. Hermione dressed up and ate the breakfast that the house-elfs had left on the desk before heading down the stairs, her robes flapping behind her. The sky was grey and she could see storm clouds blowing towards the castle. But, as she had no plans of going out, Hermione didn't care.

The castle wasn't that empty. People were running around, carrying things all over the place, and she didn't even dare to peak into the Great Hall. Instead, she went to the library. It smelled exactly like a library should, leather, paper, and ink.

She stuffed her arms full with books before heading up to her room again. Or that was what she had planned if not the beautiful painting had caught her eye. So instead of saying the password Hermione pressed the books to hide her chest (she had become used to this, not wanting to show her body to anyone) and smiled carefully.

"What are you?"

"A human. Or I am to look like one," Evangeline answered, seating herself on the grass behind her, picking a pear from her tree. "I often hear that paintings have it good, being able to see so many masterpieces. But I don't agree. How many paintings are there in the world compared to beautiful places? I would much rather see the world."

"If you'd like it, I can tell you."

"Describe it?"

"Yes of course. What do you want to know?"

"Tell me about Paris", the woman whispered and Hermione smiled brightly for the first time in months, settling down on the cold stone floor preparing herself to tell this human painting about the streets of Paris that she had walked with her parents, about the Eiffel tower and the bookshops that she had passed. She felt almost happy.

* * *

Hermione breathed heavily, staring at the mirror. Was it her or were the uniform getting tighter? She knew what it was. Hermione had never had a woman's proportions and now that she had them, she felt exposed. She swallowed and brushed through the bush that was called hair. People often made fun of it, but Hermione liked it.

She put it up in a ballerinaknot and breathed once more, extra deep. Soon the students were to arrive and she felt a dizziness buzzing in her head. Her palms were sweaty and she tried to cover the most of her body with the cloak, wrapping it around her.

The reflection showed a small girl with a tan (that had begun to fade away), with tired hazel eyes and dry lips, hair messy and neck still bruised.

Hermione lifted her wand and covered them with a simple charm and tried to make her hair look like a smaller mess before slowly making her way down the stairs.

The basement was quite cold but Evangeline was sitting in the sunshowered grass eating another pear. Hermione had spent her day down there with the painting, told her about the trips she and her parents had made. She had seemed to grow fond of the girl.

"Good luck," Evangeline said and smiled encouragingly, a smile that wasn't returned by the other girl.

The walk to the Great Hall seemed shorter than it used to be and soon, she found herself at the Gryffindor table, quietly running her fingers over the wooden table.

After ten minutes, the teachers came, all of them paying her small attention. Her head counted down the seconds until it was time.

_15, 14, 13, 12…_

Hermione tried to keep calm but her mind only went to her parents and Australia- and then back to her house and the tv- and then again to Australia.

_5, 4, 3, 2, 1…_

And when the doors opened, Hermione's heart leaped back to the Great Hall, gathering all her courage and making herself smile extremely bright.

* * *

**A/N: **Yes, I know. Short, boring, did I say short(the parts themself were short. I'll make them longer next chapter)? Well, introductions are never fun. Please, review, tell me what you thought. I would also love to hear what you would like to happen. I'll consider everything.


	2. Lilac violets

**A/N: **I'm tired as hell, and pissed as hell so we'll see how this is going to end.

**Chapter 2- **Lilac Violets

The students came rushing in, some shy and some so familiar with the walls of the school that they welcomed it like welcomed them. Hermione searched through the crowd after her friend, her smile beginning to ache, her lips drying out.

There were few people from her year but the girl managed to spot the Patil sisters, Seamus Finnegan and Dean Thomas and a few more. And then they strode in.

Harry still hadn't tamed his hair and he looked worn out and tired, his robes not quite hiding the fact that he had thinned out. Hermione felt something hack in her chest and she felt like all she wanted to do was hugging him. Hermione had truly missed Harry.

But then she glanced over to the Weasleys. Ron had grown even taller (if it was possible) and had even grown some muscles. His hair was cut short and he looked a bit like someone put make up on him. Hermione cringed at the sight. He looked like he was going to be in some advertisement for the muggle military.

Ginny on the other hand looked the same. She had grown, and unlike Hermione, she was not afraid of showing it.

Behind them, Luna and Neville walked, joining Seamus and Dean in a conversation. It was actually Luna who noticed Hermione first and she was happy for it. Even though Hermione still thought that Luna was strange, she was a kind person with just enough mystery in her, and the conversations that they had may be on a different level but they were interesting.

"Hermione", she breathed in an airy voice and hugged her friend. It was the first human touch in month but it was not uncomfortable. Luna's hair smelled of rose and rain, and Hermione had never noticed that the girl was almost as tall as her.

Ginny was the next. She ran up to Hermione and hugged her tightly, laughing.

"Oh I's so good to see you!" she said but then bent down to Hermione's ear. "Where the hell have you been?" she hissed, clenching the other girl hardly. Ginny was extremely strong for her size and Hermione had some problems with breathing. But, who needs air anyways?

Hermione swallowed her lungs even farther down her torso.

"I was searching for my parents. Ginny I'm so sorry I didn't contact you, but mom wanted some private time in France and we ended up staying there for a while."

Hermione really needed to get used to lying. But the redhead just nodded and then went all giddy again, hugging her once more, still harshly.

When the hug ended it was Harrys turn. She said the same thing to him, but hugged him a bit harder. He seemed to understand. They were the two of the trio that seemed to take the war the hardest even though Ron was the one who had lost a brother. Ron had never been in the centre of interest, but after the war he seemed to make the stories bigger and told them as if he were the hero. He enjoyed it very much and Hermione liked seeing him happy.

Speaking of Ron, he lifted her up in the air and kissed her on the cheek like time hadn't even passed. Hermione was disgusted. Just a few weeks ago he had been dating some other of his whores. But she pushed the thoughts away and smiled brightly. Her cheeks began to hurt.

"So, how you all been?" Hermione asked when they had sat down and she quickly explained her depart in some haste. She played with her fingers under the table, twisting and turning them, tearing her nails of, bit by bit. She wanted to rip the hands apart, like they were gloves.

"Well, Harry got a job at the Auror department but he's taking this year off," Ginny declared proudly and Hermione's smile was for the first time true.

"Oh that's wonderful Harry! But can they hire you without a few years of training. I've read the magical terms and conditions for the aurors training, and they can't hire a person without a complete background check, four years of training and a year under watch."

Harry laughed, a restrained laugh that only she seemed to notice was an octave to high.

"I've just started my training," he said and Hermione blushed a bit. The rest of them laughed.

"So, Hermione. How was France?" Ron asked, stuffing his mouth full. She swallowed harshly and started sipping on the pumpkin juice thinking of what she was going to say.

"Well, it rained a bit too much, but it was lovely. Very classy. And the bookstores were perfect."

Ron grunted. "Always our Hermione", he said and Hermione turned her face away, ignoring how hurtful that sentence had been.

They began speaking of something else and Hermione took that time to scan the Great Hall. There were a lot of people but you could clearly see that the amount of Slytherins had become smaller. Even though that, Hermione caught a glimpse of silver hair amongst the crowd.

Draco Malfoy seemed a bit untidy with his hair, having it grown a bit. He looked worn out but that smug look on his face was still there, only a bit faded. He didn't talk to anyone it seemed, but the people around him were clearly friends of his because he seemed relaxed.

And then the man himself lifted his eyes and met hers. Hazel and steel. But they weren't cold and mocking. They were soft but tired. Hermione blushed at the fact that she had stared but didn't have the time to lower her eyes before he did.

After the dinner, the Gryffindors made their way to the common room. It wasn't as crowded as it used to be, so they took their seats in front of the fire, Hermione sitting the closest. It was the first time in years that she had been in the Gryffindor common room, but it felt like home. She sighed deeply and propped her back up against Ginny's legs.

The redhead laughed. "Do you reckon that we'll share chambers this year?" she asked and Hermione cursed mentally. She cleared her throat.

"Actually, the reason McGonagall asked me to come here a few days earlier was because I've got my own chambers this year."

The shock wasn't as big as she'd thought. Ginny was the first one to snap out of the trance.

"That's lovely 'Mione, you've got to let me visit! Though this might end in me having to share a dorm with Parvati and Sarah", she made a disgusted face before lightning up again.

Ron too seemed to have taken the news brightly. Hermione didn't even want to imagine his thoughts. Harry on the other hand put a hand on her shoulder which she hugged tightly.

Ginny leaned onto Harry and Dean and Seamus pushed themselves forward, sitting down. Even though they used to hang out, Hermione never really enjoyed their company. So while the other began talking about Quidditch (Extremely enthusiastically), Hermione leaned back and stared into the fire. Sparks flew every each second and the colours were marvellous. Her eyes watered and the fire itself grew distant. She really needed a kit kat. And wine. Yes, wine. She thought about speaking with Evangeline, but she knew that there would be Slytherins there, and she really didn't want to confront them when she was this vulnerable. So she made her head comfortable and listened to her friends speaking.

* * *

At eight a clock, Hermione decided to leave. After saying good-bye and checking their common classes (she didn't have to see Ron during potions and none of her friends were in Ancient Runes), the girl left for the kitchens. She hadn't eaten anything in the last months but chocolate and wine, and she still needed some. She knew that the house-elfs had some wine in the kitchens for the teachers, but she didn't think that they would bother if she poured herself some. She entered the kitchens and was meet by a warm fire.

"Winky, hi", she greeted the house-elf. She seemed to have installed herself in Hogwarts but she still refused to answer Hermione. So instead, the girl asked another elf if she could have some chocolate and wine. They were eager to help and one even put out a small table and chair for her, promising not to tell on her.

The wine was fruity but still had that bitter after-taste that she liked, and she sipped it while slowly eating her chocolates. The house-elfs weren't usually in that part of the kitchens and they moved a few rooms to the left, leaving her alone. Not that she minded. Hermione had grown used to being alone and she was quite fond of it.

Hermione had just drawn out paper and a pen to start drawing. She did enjoy drawing and writing with ink, but it really didn't beat a pen. She had brought it, and a dozen others with her, because she had taken a liking to scribble. But the thing was, that when she had just started writing, the door behind her opened and closed, making her hand stop in a sudden movement.

She turned around and found Draco Malfoy looking at her tiredly.

"Malfoy," she noted with a tense voice and he nodded as a greeting before demanding the house-elfs to bring him something in a low voice.

There was only on seat so Malfoy walked around, waiting impatient.

"Well, I did not expect to see you here."

Malfoy tensed but turned around to meet her gaze. Was it possible for someone to have so light eyes? Hermione sipped on her wine, wishing that she was at home.

"I would rather not be here, especially as your annoying friends seems to try their hardest to hit me in my face. But an education is required and I'd rather go here than in Durmstrang. There has been some chaos there, I've heard."

"I think my friends have some reasons to want to hit you in your face, Malfoy."

"Well, yes", he said haughtily and smirked at her with some sort of sadness. "But it's still annoying. So, Granger, what brings you to the kitchens at this late hour?"

Hermione almost laughed.

"It's half past eight. It cannot be that late."

"May I ask you, when do you usually eat dinner?" Hermione became quit. "I myself wanted some coffee and it seems like they don't serve it here usually I have understood by the time that they require to make some."

"They try extremely hard", Hermione muttered and he smirked again.

"Ah, Spew, wasn't it?"

"S.P.E.W. actually", she replied, taking a big sip of the wine. Make that two sips. Malfoy chuckled.

"So again, what brings you here? I guess that you did not expect my lovely company", he said with dripping sarcasm, accepting the cup of coffee that was offered to him by a house-elf. Hermione laughed at him.

"Oh Malfoy, if I knew that someone was going to be here at all, I'd run as hell. You are not very special at the moment."

"Oh, I'm very special", he said and Hermione shot him a dark look, only making him chuckle harder.

"Why do you act like this?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're still better than me", fuck, the glass was empty and here chocolates gone. Perfect. She needed something stronger to drink but Hermione knew that the best thing that she could do was to go back, talk a bit with Evangeline and go to bed.

Malfoy's smile faltered and he sat down on the newly brought chair that another house-elf had brought him. Hermione thought that he could at least give them a thank you.

"I am no better than you, I think the war settled that", he said, tensely.

"Then why do you still act like a spoiled brat?"

"Because I am one. And everyone needs a façade that keeps people away. Like you."

"What?"

"It takes one to know one."

"I do not have a façade", Hermione said, swallowing harshly. She did not like where this conversation was going. She didn't like it at all. She twisted her fingers once again. Oh dear, she hated how she always did that. It made her fingers chapped.

"Please Granger. It's like looking at a living person inside a statue. I am surprised the Weasel and Weaslette didn't notice that. You're lucky that Potter did."

"You observe too much."

"I have nothing better to do. Well, that's the only fun I can have and oh how I need it. This year is not going to be pleasant for me, I tell you."

"Like this year is going to be pleasant for anyone", Hermione said, tying her hair up again after it magically had fallen down. Malfoy snorted (well, if Malfoys can snort).

"The big heroine thinks that her life is difficult."

"As a matter of fact, I think that it is."

"You know nothing", he said and that made her laugh. He seemed taken back because Malfoy looked a bit shocked with big eyes. She smiled, not kindly but neither unkindly.

"You've read Game of Thrones?" she asked.

"Only the first three", he muttered, scratching his head. "The only muggle books that are alright."

"How many have you read?"

"Not many. But I thought that that was a god way to spend the summer. Going out wasn't an option."

"Again, what did you read?" she asked, extremely shocked that Draco Malfoy had read muggle books. They were Hermione's favourites, because while she enjoyed the wizarding books, they couldn't write fiction. They sucked at it.

Malfoys cheeks actually reddened a bit at the question.

"Those three books, pride and prejudice and Les Miserables."

"Pride and prejudice?" she asked, realizing that this was Draco Malfoy she was talking with. He nodded. Hermione stood up.

"How fun this has been Malfoy. But I have to go."

"Thank Merlin, I thought you never would", he muttered and Hermione smile, walking to the door. Exactly when she was about to go through it, he spoke up.

"We are not friends Granger."

"I know that."

* * *

She almost ran to the dungeons, only wanting to get some rest. It felt even chillier than before.

"It's the bloody Slytherings and their so called souls", a voice called out and Hermione smiled. Evangeline was sitting in some sort of yoga position. "I've been waiting for you", she said, sounding annoyed.

"I got delayed", she answered.

"By who?" the black-haired girl asked, eyeing Hermione suspiciously.

"I was with my friends in the common-room before drinking a lot of wine."

"So you didn't eat anything during dinner? How was your friends? Did you speak honestly or? That Ronald fellow?"

"One question a time", Hermione mused patently. "No, I didn't eat anything. I wasn't hungry."

"Oh, sure. Chocolate?" Hermione nodded. Evangeline smiled faintly.

"My friends are good, Harry's a bit quiet, and the war had a big impact on him. The others are good."

"Again, the Ronald fella?" Hermione bit her tongue.

"Strange."

"And by that you mean?" Evangeline asked. Hermione realized that she was the most conversation the girl got a day. She didn't really like the rest of the paintings.

"He acted like everything was lovely and I was his honey." Evangeline made a disgusted face.

"Those are the worst. Tell me about your other friends."

"Luna is kind of strange but amazing. She's a star. Not a singing one or so, but a really shining ball of light in silver. When I first met her it was extremely strange, but that is past…"

"Who's there?" a harsh voice rang out and Hermione heard footsteps. Malfoy reached them after around fifteen seconds.

"Granger", he sounded really tired. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Before she had a chance to reply, Evangeline seemed to take the situation over.

"What the hell are you doing here? I'm fucking talking to my friends and….I can't see you, can you just come a bit closer mate?"

Malfoy sighed and took a step to his left, eyeing the painting with something in his eye, curiosity? Evangeline looked at him appreciatively.

"Please say that this is the Ronald fella. Because I really don't mind him then."

Hermione groaned mentally.

"This is Draco Malfoy", she said. "Malfoy, can you please just leave us alone?"

"Again Granger. What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be with your dear little friends, having a slumberparty?"

"I live here."

"Here?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"In the tower."

"Why so?" he asked, running a hand through his hair. Hermione leaned against the wall. It was extremely cold. They really needed electricity and radiators.

"You know, neurotic problems with sleeping near people", she said casually, turning to Evangeline, whispering the password. "I'll talk to you in the morning", she said to the painting and then turned to Malfoy. "I'll be going."

"Granger…"

"I _know_. Not friends", she sighed before closing the door after herself and beginning to walk the stairs. Her legs ached. The night hadn't quite turned out as she had hoped and it had tired her out. She wasn't used to so much talking. Before the war, she could be rambling about some historical wizard fact, but she had lost the energy to do that. She really missed her parents. Parents are the people who are closest to one's heart. They are so strong family. And they didn't even remember her.

Hermione had cried her eyes out months ago and tears was a lost cause, she had realized. It didn't make them come back. She rubbed her arm, hoping that the tan would disappear in poff.

She reached her room and opened it, almost falling into bed. But she made herself go up again, made herself change into a tanktop and pyjamapants. She made herself brush her teeth and wash her face, made herself walk back to the bed and putting the ear-plugs in her ears. After that, she relaxed, flowing into the music, her mind dissolving.

* * *

**I actually made it kind of an alright length. I destroyed my other fanfiction (I hated it, so I think that it's alright) so I'm going to focus on this. I would love to hear your thoughts. Love, Emma. **


End file.
